When Richard Dueñas, a devout Christian who works in finance, decided to put his vote toward electing Donald Trump as president in November, he didn’t consider that it might be held against him — until he tried dating.

“In the modern world we live in, unfortunately, with the views one has, they kind of put you in a category, not because you want to, but that's just the way you lean at the moment,” he said. “I don't think it's right morally looking for a specific category to date because you never know. You just don't know, you could find someone else in a different category when you're dating.”

But Dueñas is only one of many struggling singles in the United States. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the percentage of men and women who have never been married has been on the rise.

While queer people don’t always share the same politics, the divide in dating between those that are heterosexual has become apparent.

A 2024 battleground poll by The New York Times and Siena College found that men from every age category were more likely to vote for Trump than Kamala Harris, while women in every age category were more likely to vote for Harris over Trump. The largest gap was seen in the youngest category of poll participants, with 53% of men ages 18 to 29 saying that they would be voting for Trump, compared to only 29% of women.

With a 2024 Oddspedia survey finding that more than half of respondents refuse to date someone with opposing political views, the question as to whether or not love could overcome the polarization in this political climate has become one highly up for debate.

People on both sides of the political spectrum can find themselves on the outs if they are a liberal man seeking a romantic relationship in California, or a progressive woman in rural Oklahoma.

However, Dueñas has remained open to the opposition.

“I think if you're going to be out there, you're going to be exposed to the elements out there. You know, I meet Person A, she believes X, Y and Z – I think that's great. And as long as we keep an open mind and respect each other's boundaries, I think we can all be, you know, live in a happy, happy world,” he said.

But will the feeling be mutual?

Data On Dating

Researchers wouldn’t say politics’ impact stops when it comes to romantic relationships.

A University of Michigan Department of Psychology survey of more than 4,000 participants, including over 500 couples, examined how frequently people date within or outside of their political tribe.

Annika From, a co-author of the study, said, “As our nation's discourse on politics has become more heightened, I think that those dating beliefs have also probably become more intense as well.”

Although nearly 23% of the study’s sample included partners in a relationship with someone of a different political party, just 8% included couples from the two different main political parties. Furthermore, researchers found that while political compatibility in romantic relationships is on the rise, so is polarization.

For romantic relationships, “political dissimilarity” could affect a person’s social network and engagement with politics. People who date outside of their party tend to be less likely to discuss politics with their partners or be open about participating in politics through voting and activism. Politically-mixed couples also experienced “lower relationship quality” in general and in daily life.

But political unlikeness in romantic relationships could also have its pros — from having greater political diversity in their social networks to feeling more warmly toward them.

For “politically dissimilar” romantic relationships that turn into parents raising children, this could even lessen political echo chambers across generations. Children in households where parents hold similar political beliefs could have less exposure to diverse points of view, creating a cycle of political similarity and polarization.

And researchers also found that there are ways to reduce the negative impact that contrasting politics can have on couples.

“Being grateful for your partner and thinking about the things that you appreciate about them, and being able to sort of step into their shoes and take their perspective may be sort of a useful thing for couples in politically dissimilar relationships,” From said.

Dating Digitally

Popular dating apps like Bumble have come to recognize the importance of politics to daters these days, adding features that allow its users to share what their leanings are, what causes they care about, and whether they voted in the elections.

Two dating app users talk politics on profiles

Photos courtesy of Charles Schneider, George Grecu

Users like George Grecu, however, have chosen not to include politics in their pursuit for love.

“I don't think political leanings are something that define a connection. When you're seeking to meet someone new, for me, it's more important to kind of share the qualities that truly make me who I am, and my political views do not really play a role in that,” he said.

But a 2023 survey by Bumble found that one in three Gen Z Zoomers were more likely to swipe right on a profile that displayed a commitment to activism. Nearly two in five of those surveyed added that it’s important to discuss politics with their matches on the first date.

Hinge user Charles Schneider thinks politics on profiles are necessary nowadays.

“I do believe it's important, and I say that because it gives at least a little bit of an idea for the kind of person you are,” Schneider said. “I feel like politics has been more polarizing than ever in today's atmosphere, and so that has kind of forced people to want way more mutually invested partners, versus maybe having someone of a different political leaning, where you might not agree on a lot of things.”

With these numbers demonstrating how democracy has made its way into the dating scene, some apps have taken their approach to combining the two a step further.

It’s why apps like “The Right Stuff,” which was created for conservatives seeking connections, have become so popular among digital daters. Its director of marketing and communications, Raquel Debono, said that The Right Stuff eliminates the need for taboo talk on the first date when it comes to being on the same page about politics.

“The biggest filter is already done for you when dating, and that's a shared set of beliefs and political affiliation,” she said. “The purpose of the app is to connect people with the same core values.”

Debono said that The Right Stuff saw a noticeable increase in downloads in the months leading up to the elections, suggesting that politics may be at play in people’s love lives. But she thinks this could just be the world we live in today.

“Americans in general have made political alignment central to their identities. And it's not a good or bad thing, it's just, it's the reality,” she said.

Overcoming Opposing Views

Dr. Jeanne Safer recounted the time her husband slept on the floor of her hospital room for a month just to be by her side while she received treatment. Doctors had diagnosed her with acute promyelocytic leukemia, a rare type of the life-threatening disease.

While Safer’s partner took to heart his vow he made over 40 years ago to love her “in sickness and in health,” part of this life-long commitment also included accepting each other’s differing political views. She, a self-proclaimed “die-hard liberal,” had married Richard Brookhiser, a political journalist for the National Review, a conservative editorial magazine.

Photo courtesy of Dr. Jeanne Safer

Dr. Jeanne Safer and her husband, Richard Brookhiser

Safer’s relationship, along with those of the more than 50 politically-mixed couples that she interviewed for her book “I Love You, but I Hate Your Politics,” were proof that these differences didn’t have to be dealbreakers.

“He’s a Republican, I’m a Democrat – big deal! Because that’s not the only thing. In fact, it’s not really the basic thing to see whether somebody can love you, somebody can treat you well, somebody can really be interested in you – that's what counts,” she said.

Safer argued that the success of a couple is far more complex than what each person does at the polls.

“They have a fantasy that if somebody shares things like voting for the same person, or stuff like that, that this is going to be a great relationship, and you're going to totally understand everything about each other – forget about it,” she said.

Not only does she think that this kind of relationship could work, but that it could offer benefits to both people involved.

“It also helps you understand more of the world. If you have exactly the same ideas as the person you're with all the time, what do you learn? You don't learn anything about how the rest of the world works, and you often have ideas that are really wrong about it,” she said.

As Dueñas navigates this new era of dating, he’s staying true to his beliefs – not just with politics, but also in the impact that they can have on meeting a potential partner.

“You're basically cutting yourself short of exploring something that could be worth a lot more than just your personal views,” he said.